Mary Elizabeth (Goggin) Kilian, 90, whose devotion to family, community, and church defined her life, died March 30, 2023 at UConn Medical Center with her five sons by her side.  

Mary was born in Stoughton, Massachusetts, the daughter of Mary Glennon and John Goggin. She graduated from Bridgewater State Teachers College in 1954 and taught elementary school in the West Hartford area until 1961, when she married Leonard Kilian, whom she had met at a Catholic Singles event.

Mary's maternal devotion lasted a lifetime. She was engaged in the lives of her children and grandchildren up until the end, offering her guidance and support. Unfailingly generous, she never forgot a birthday or special occasion. Her homemade Valentines Day cards, with their hand-cut paper lace inserts and acrostics, were legendary within the family. 

Her inclination to nurture extended to the community, where she always did whatever she could do for the people around her. Whether it was scouring tag sales for a needed item, baking for fundraisers, giving rides, or helping people move or find housing—Mary was there, hands-on. In the ‘80s, her and Len’s commitment to social justice saw them demonstrating frequently, including at the 1982 rally against nuclear arms in Central Park. 

Throughout her life Mary was an adventurous person who loved exploring museums, traveling, camping, visiting family and friends, and especially spending time at the Goggin family cottages in Wareham, where she bicycled to and from the beach, well into her eighties. She faithfully attended and enjoyed her bible study, book, and church groups.

Mary was a talented seamstress who could make anything from drapes, clothing, and sleeping bags to flags for her sons’ Boy Scout patrols. As each new daughter-in-law and grandchild joined the family, Mary made another Christmas stocking and eventually ended up filling 20 stockings each December.

She was a dedicated volunteer for the Catholic Church, and in recognition of her work on behalf of St. Helena Parish, she received a St. Joseph Medal of Appreciation in 2006.

Drawing on her characteristic optimism, determination, and self-reliance, Mary maintained her independence as well as she could to the end of her life. She frequently counted her blessings and often remarked–usually at family gatherings at which all her sons and their families were present–that she considered herself a very lucky person.

Mary was predeceased by her husband, Leonard, and by her brother, Joseph Goggin.  She leaves her sons and their families: Michael Kilian (Valerie Hurley) and Helen, Peter, and Thomas Kilian; Joe Kilian (Dina Kravets), Pearl Kravets, and Gersh and Ellis Kilian; John Kilian (Beth Kilian) and Caroline, Kathryn, and Jack Kilian; Dan Kilian (Colleen Fellingham); and Steve Kilian (Nancy Rankin) and Izzy Kilian. She is also survived by her sister-in-law, Luetta Goggin; her brother-in-law, Donald Kilian, and his wife Mary Jo; by eight nieces and nephews; and by many dear friends. 

Calling hours will be Friday, May 26, from 5 p.m. to 7 p.m. at the Sheehan Hilborn Breen Funeral Home, 1084 New Britain Avenue, West Hartford. A Mass of Christian Burial will be celebrated Saturday, May 27, noon at St. Peter Claver Church, 47 Pleasant St., West Hartford, followed by a reception in the Parish Hall. The public is also invited to share their memories of Mary and to honor the people who cared for her in her last year Saturday, May 13, between 4 p.m. and 8 p.m. at the Elmwood Community Center, 1106 New Britain Ave., West Hartford. To leave condolences, please visit www.SheehanHilbornBreen.com. In lieu of flowers, donations in memory of Mary can be made to Catholic Charities–Archdiocese of Hartford, 839-841 Asylum Ave., Hartford, CT 06105-2801 or at www.ccaoh.org.